I have a love-hate relationship with writing.
As a person who hardly opens herself up to people, I find that writing heals. It helps me to acknowledge my feelings, process my thoughts, and finally let them go through the lines of words. When I’m able to get these thoughts out of my head, sometimes the negative emotions also go with them. My mind becomes clutter-free and I feel like I can think clearer.
Also, you know how sometimes there are these little voices inside your head telling you what you should be doing and who you’re supposed to be? When I write, those voices are gone. My mind—and heart—will feel much lighter.
I think it’s safe to say that, for me, writing has become a form of self-therapy. It’s therapeutic. Besides, writing offers a safe space where I can just pour my heart out without being worried about what people might think. Writing can also be a record of my personal development. Reading some of my old writings back now, I realize how much I’ve changed, how many struggles I went through, and how I could survive through it all.
However, these kinds of feelings only arise when I write for my own pleasure. It doesn’t apply to when I write for work although I love what I’m doing and I’m grateful to have a chance to earn money from writing. But writing for professional gigs just isn’t the same because there’s this pressure to meet other people’s expectations. And it doesn’t help when sometimes your brain decides to be on a glitch and won’t cooperate with you to construct the right words. Ah, writer’s block.
Meanwhile, when you write for yourself, you have all the freedom to form whatever words and sentences to write. That’s why I said I have a love-hate relationship with writing. Nevertheless, I don’t think I’ll stop writing anytime soon. I hope I can keep doing this even until I’m old and have grandchildren so that I can encourage them to do the same.
(P.S: This post marks the end of the #30DaysWritingChallenge! I can’t believe I could finish this. It has been fun and quite challenging since I wasn’t familiar with some of the topics. Good job, self, you finished what you started. Let’s find another writing challenge, shall we?)
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